Two of our staff weigh in on a recent read.

Deborah Chilcoat, MEd

Arianna de la Mancha

February 12, 2026

The rage is exhausting these days. Not aligning lockstep with those you respect and love is terrifying. And being iced out—for any reason, or no reason at all—is crushing. If this is resonating with you, you’ve got to read Calling In: How to Start Making Change with Those You’d Rather Cancel (2025) by Loretta J. Ross.

Loretta Ross is no stranger to intense feelings and reactions about injustices in our world as a social justice activist since the 1970s and one of the mothers of the reproductive justice movement. However, after decades of doing this work, she has arrived at the practice of “calling in,” and I think she is right in saying that this approach may be the only way we are going to actualize a more humane, empathic society in which people’s rights are not trampled upon or stripped outright.

Without investing time and energy in one another, nothing changes.

Ross writes that Ngọc Loan Trần’s practice of “calling in” reminds us that we are fully capable of building connections with those with whom we disagree, genuinely listening to their experiences and beliefs, and the values they hold, and getting to know them as individuals rather than lumping them together based on preconceived notions or what an algorithm feeds them. Without investing time and energy in one another, nothing changes. We will sustain our pain, be afraid of conflict, and isolate ourselves. Nothing will change.

What is “calling in?” It’s simple and complex, simultaneously, and certainly why Ross’s book gripped me so strongly. She describes calling in as a rigorous practice and an appeal to join together and soften our stance in small and large ways to achieve a common goal. Calling in is an opportunity to heal “our relationships with ourselves and others, which requires radical forgiveness and radical love” (p.30). Every moment of every day, we have a choice to call someone in rather than calling them out.

Deb’s Take: The Choice of Calling In

I love that Ross shares stories and reflects on a time in her life and work when calling people out was the tactic she relied on and her “go-to” response when conflict arose. She talks about how a call-out is thrilling and addictive because of the power that comes with it. Sometimes, dishing out sharp words and spewing rage does feel good in the moment. The problem is that when the moment ends, as Ross writes, call-outs do serious damage. They hurt and alienate people, even allies and potential allies, and damage relationships and reputations.

For those who have been on the receiving end of a call-out (and who hasn’t?), they likely steer clear of the person who called them out, and similar situations, in the future for fear of getting called out again. It is demoralizing and humiliating. The target of a call-out has their dignity and power often stripped bare.

When trying to change the world—or your corner of the world, at least—for the better, call-outs, according to Ross, should be reserved for times “when they target powerful people beyond our reach and when public scrutiny is a strategic weapon we deploy against the unreachably powerful” (p. 42).

Ross shares poignant stories in her book to make the point that calling in is more effective—and less violent—than calling out. She notes, “that all of the successful organizations and movements I’d been a part of had been able to succeed because they adopted the tenets of calling in before we’d even been able to put a name to these practices” (p.31).

Is calling in easy? Not in the least. We are human after all, willing to scrap verbally and/or physically to defend everything we (think we) know, believe, and possess. We’ve been taught not to compromise because it makes us seem weak. The problem with that way of thinking and being is that we remain isolated, ignorant, hurt, and afraid.

We can choose to adopt the practice of calling in, or not. What will you choose?

Arianna’s Take: The Quiet Work of Calling In

Reading Loretta Ross’s Calling In stayed with me longer than I expected. Not because it felt easy or comforting—but because it challenged something I’ve been holding tightly: the instinct to protect my peace at all costs.

One idea that keeps echoing for me is Ross’s reminder that people can evolve. Minds can change. Values can shift. But the path to that change is rarely clean or linear. It’s filled with missteps, awkward conversations, defensive reactions, and harm along the way. That reality doesn’t excuse harm—but it does complicate the way we think about accountability, growth, and connection.

I find myself constantly toggling between a genuine desire to build bridges and a very real need to protect myself.

I think that complication is exactly why so many people resist Ross’s ask to “call people in.” I know I do. I find myself constantly toggling between a genuine desire to build bridges and a very real need to protect myself. In the current moment, it often feels unproductive—or even unsafe—to try to understand “the other side,” especially when those beliefs are rooted in hate or actively deny the humanity of others. There’s a deep exhaustion that comes from being asked, again and again, to extend grace in situations where harm feels intentional and ongoing.

This doesn’t mean every situation deserves engagement. Protecting our peace is still necessary. Boundaries are still acts of care. But calling in offers another tool—one that reminds us that transformation, while slow and imperfect, is still possible. And that how we move through conflict matters just as much as the values we claim to hold.

I don’t have this figured out. I’m still learning when to lean in and when to step back. But Ross’s work pushes me to stay curious, even when it’s uncomfortable—and to remember that change rarely comes from silence or shame.

Photos By: Jonas Jacobsson and Julia Avamotive

Deborah Chilcoat, MEd, is the Director of our Capacity Building Department at Healthy Teen Network and is nationally recognized as a seasoned trainer and adolescent sexual and reproductive health expert. When home, she is savoring every moment with her incredibly fun family and their lovable dogs. Read more about Deb. 

Arianna de la Mancha is an artist, writer, sex educator, and Communications Designer at Healthy Teen Network. With a unique background in sexual wellness product development, and a passion for inclusive, queer sex education, they bring a distinct blend of creativity and sex-positive expertise to nonprofit communications and adolescent sexual and reproductive health. In their free time, you’ll find them tending to their plants or crate-digging for their growing record collection. Read more about Arianna.

The post One Book, Two Takes: Calling In by Loretta J. Ross appeared first on Healthy Teen Network.

Here is your mission, should you choose to accept it:

Dive deep into county-level data to identify factors contributing to the sexual and reproductive health outcomes of young people in your community, identify leverage points to improve health outcomes, and execute a plan for positive change.

If you choose to accept your mission, proceed to the Instructions Section.

Instructions:

1. Gather county-level data from the Youth Risk Behavior Surveillance (YRBS) and your state health department.
2. Pull key state and county-level health behavior and other data, including:
   • Demographic data as reported by respondents: age, sex, gender, sexual orientation, race, and ethnicity;
   • Health behaviors such as, but not limited to sexual health, mental health, violence, bullying among LGBTQ+ youth, substance use, housing stability, and food insecurity;
   • Outcome data such as state and county birth and STI rates; school enrollment, attendance, and graduation and graduation equivalency data; and, if useful, data related to post-secondary education and employment.
3. We strongly advise that you do not undertake this mission alone. Expand your crew by inviting the community to join the mission. Include folks who care about, interact with, and support young people, and those who live and work in the community. Consider:
   • Teachers, social workers, guidance counselors, school administrators, and higher education faculty,
   • Parents and guardians, and
   • Community members, civic leaders, faith leaders, and business owners who employ young people in the community now and in the future.
4. Facilitate your crew’s first work session. Review county-level health sexual and reproductive and other health behavior and outcome data.
5. Discuss the data in small teams using the following questions, and share with the entire crew afterward:
   • What was most surprising about the data? Why?
   • How do these data challenge your assumptions about adolescent health in your community?
   • Who else should we invite to be part of our crew?
   • What questions do you have for young people in the community?
   • What questions do you have for other key folks in the community?
   • Are there other county data or information (e.g., policies) that we didn’t consider that you’d like to explore?
6. Identify the contributing factors related to the health outcomes of youth in your community.
7. Determine which leverage points are most likely to result in the greatest movement toward improving youth health outcomes.
8. Build a plan with your crew.
9. Identify and invite additional crew members who will contribute to successful execution of the plan.
10. Fire up your crew and execute your plan!

One final note, your mission must be sustained and periodically replicated to ensure the plan is on course. Success will be measured by evidence of improved health outcomes among youth in your community.

After reviewing this document, if you believe you are fit for this mission and are willing to dive deep for the young people of today and future generations, welcome aboard!

If you are not ready to take on this mission, reflect on why that is and what you need to get ready. We are always looking for dedicated folks like yourself as candidates for future missions, maybe even one with a crew of young people from your community!

What’s it going to take to get you to say yes?

Acknowledgment: Special thanks to Annie Smith, PhD and Beth Marshall, PhD from the Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health, Center for Adolescent Health for their work developing True You Maryland’s County Systems Thinking Workshop (i.e., data dives). Thanks also goes to the entire True You Maryland team for executing this activity with our partners.

Content for this blog post is derived from “Fostering Systems Thinking for Adolescent Sexual Health in Rural Communities” (Smith, A. & Long-White, D., 2021, October) presented at the 2021 APHA Annual Meeting and Expo, and the “County Systems Thinking Workshop” (2020-2021).

Deborah Chilcoat, MEd, is the Director of our Capacity Building Department at Healthy Teen Network and is nationally recognized as a seasoned trainer and adolescent sexual and reproductive health expert. When home, she is savoring every moment with her incredibly fun family and their lovable dogs. Read more about Deb.

The post The Not-So-Top-Secret Mission to Improve Adolescent Health Outcomes appeared first on Healthy Teen Network.

Getting to the west coast can be tricky, but luckily, I have some tips from my recent visit to share (especially for my fellow East Coast folks)!

By Deborah Chilcoat, MEd

March 30, 2023

So, you want to come to Portland, Oregon, for this year’s Healthy Teen Network conference, Take Care and Take Action? That’s great! If you’ve been to our conference before, you already know you’re going to learn a lot, be inspired, and meet lots of new colleagues who share the same passion for supporting young people’s sexual health, well-being, and rights. If you’ve never attended our conference, then check out the conference website and Agenda At-A-Glance, so you’ll know what to expect.

If you’ve been to our conference before, you already know you’re going to learn a lot, be inspired, and meet lots of new colleagues who share the same passion for supporting young people’s sexual health, well-being, and rights.

Okay, so now that you are “all in,” what’s next? Start planning! Based on my recent trip from the east coast to Portland, here are a few things you might definitely want to consider:

Getting There (Especially from the East Coast)

Getting to Portland (Portland, Oregon, NOT Portland, Maine) can be tricky, especially coming from the east coast. While there are a few nonstop flights, expect to book a flight that has a layover. It may take a little longer, but you’ll get the best price and, who knows, you may have an unexpected experience like I did during my layover in Oakland, CA. As I walked around the terminal, I discovered a glass encased display commemorating the 35th Anniversary of The AIDS Memorial Quilt. It explained the history of the movement, along with various artifacts related to it. Heartbreaking and inspiring.

Airport Interactions

There were also some funny moments during my layover, such as when I was standing at the charging station with two folks—one was a guy—waiting for our flight when an older woman came over. She was very chatty and engaged everyone at the counter. As she was talking, she grabbed the tall, iced coffee that was sitting on the counter and took a refreshing sip from the straw. We all looked at her, then at each other, confused. She was drinking the guy’s coffee! He played it cool, asking her, with a devilish look on his face, if she liked his coffee.  We all had a good laugh, even the woman, and the guy shrugged his shoulders and kept drinking through his straw.  Maybe you had to be there… 

Get the Wi-Fi (Trust Us)

Spring for the premium in-flight Wi-Fi! It’s about the cost of a trip to Starbuck’s and worth every penny, especially if you forget to download the bazillion articles and resources you intended to read, and all the conference and webinar recordings still open in your browser’s tabs that you meant to watch eons ago. Just sit back, pop on your earphones, and feel your professional capacity growing. 

Be Open to Meeting New People!  

Being open to meeting new people during your travels is a great primer for connecting with new folks in the field at #HealthyTeen23. The same guy who had his drink sampled by the woman in Oakland’s airport, sat with me the flight to Portland. For those of you who don’t know, I am the best seat mate ever: I love the window seat, I wear earplugs, and I rarely talk or need to go to the restroom. Well, Mr. Oakland sat in my row, and we talked the entire flight…let me repeat that…the entire fight!  We are about the same age, so we talked about stuff “people our age” talk about and had similar life experiences. We were from different coasts and cultures, and he gave me a book that has really shifted my outlook on life’s challenges—you truly never know where you may end up meeting a new friend and gaining new insights in the process! 

Register for #HealthyTeen23 Early and Get a Great Deal  

Last recommendation. Registration opens May 1st. Add it to your calendar. Go on, I’ll wait. Okay, remember that attending our conference adds value to you and your organization. Your organization shows it is invested in your professional growth, and you return ready to Take Care and Take Action sharing and using the resources, topics, innovative ideas and strategies, and connections that you’ve made while with us. So, if you did not mark your calendar yet, even after I gave you time earlier to do it, now is the time. The sooner your register, the less it will cost to attend: Early Bird Registration opens May 1st! See you in Portland!   Join us at #HealthyTeen23 PHOTO CREDIT: Trang Nguyen on Unsplash

Deborah Chilcoat, MEd, is a Senior Manager for our Capacity Building and Evaluation Department at Healthy Teen Network and is nationally recognized as a seasoned trainer and adolescent sexual and reproductive health expert. When home, she is savoring every moment with her incredibly fun family and their lovable dogs. Read more about Deb.

The post Traveling to Portland for #HealthyTeen23? Start Planning Now  appeared first on Healthy Teen Network.

I Googled “grandparents as sex educators” today. I wanted to write about the role grandparents play in educating their grandchildren about love, relationships, sexuality, gender identity, and all the amazing things that make us sexual beings. The browser declared “About 96,700,000 results (0.52 seconds).”

Really?

Now, I cannot vouch for the quality or content of all 96 million hits, but I read the top three, and these are the takeaways and my thoughts about them.

“Grandparents As Sexuality Educators: Having Our Say” (2001), available as a preview from ProQuest, is easily found as the full article from SIECUS. First, the authors write, “Even though most of us who are currently grandparents experienced woefully inadequate education about sexuality, we wish to improve this process for our grandchildren.” Isn’t that amazing?!

The trouble is, though, not all grandparents are, like one of the authors, a sexuality educator who is comfortable talking with their grandchildren about these topics. The authors provide a couple suggestions of what grandparents can do, but their experience at the time the article was published applied to younger children. Twenty-one years later, it would be great to ask the authors how well their conversations went as their grandchildren went through adolescents and early adulthood. Their oldest grandchild would be around 27 years old now and the youngest would be around 22 years old.

The next article, “A Grandparent’s Guide to Sex Ed” (2020, November 28) by Jennifer Gibson, MA, includes more contemporary and essential topics such as consent. I appreciate that she advises grandparents “to understand the approaches and philosophies their [grandchildren’s] parents are using” and recommends Amaze.org as a resource.

Parents and grandparents have to be aligned in lots of ways including bedtimes, food choices, safety, and what and how to discuss sexuality! So, for all you Grams, Gramps, Pops, or Mom-Moms out there, grab some popcorn and your laptop! You WILL most definitely learn some new stuff from Amaze and be better prepared talking with your grandchildren about human sexuality. (Hmmm, maybe invite YOUR kids over for a viewing party! That could be a great way to start some overdue conversations with them about sex and sexuality. Am I right?)

Dr. Karen Rayne shares the experience of finding “that both adults and youth want deeper intergenerational conversations about sexuality, but no one want to be the first one out of the gate to start those talks.” Well, now, that’s a bit of a pickle, isn’t it?

The last result comes from the Center for Sex Education. I mean, how can anyone resist the title, “Getting Grandparents to Talk Gonads (and Other Important Topics Related to Sexuality)”? Published in October 2014, Dr. Karen Rayne shares the experience of finding “that both adults and youth want deeper intergenerational conversations about sexuality, but no one want to be the first one out of the gate to start those talks.”  Well, now, that’s a bit of a pickle, isn’t it? The need and desire are there, but everyone is like, “You go first.” “No, you go first.” Around and around they go!

Fortunately, Dr. Rayne includes a lesson plan that can be used to get the conversation going. (Notice, I did not say “that grandparents can use.” Young people could easily adapt this to be an activity THEY facilitate with their grandparents.) “Grandparents: Sexuality Educators Par Excellence” includes an exploration about becoming a sexual person when the grandparent was a young person compared to their grandchild’s experience. Grandparents usually like to share stories, so this may be the way to get “out of the gate” and into the conversation. The lesson also reminds the grandparent and their grandchild that “grandparents can be a positive influence in the sexual learning of their grandchildren.” (This could definitely go the other way, too: the grandparent could learn some things from their grandchild.) This is a very practical article that holds up over time.

There are many, many more resources available for grandparents. And, if you like any of the 96,699,997 remaining online articles from my Google search and they are fairly current, useful, and practical, let me know!

PHOTO CREDIT: Kiattisak on Adobe Stock

Deborah Chilcoat, MEd, is a Senior Manager for our Capacity Building and Evaluation Department at Healthy Teen Network and is nationally recognized as a seasoned trainer and adolescent sexual and reproductive health expert. When home, she is savoring every moment with her incredibly fun family and their lovable dogs. Read more about Deb.

The post Conversations Between Grandparents and Grandchildren: Love, Relationships, and Human Sexuality appeared first on Healthy Teen Network.

If  you are a dog parent, or ever had a loving pet in your life, you already know how responsive they are to our emotions.

By Deborah Chilcoat, MEd

December 15, 2022

As I was passing my pups laying on the couch (spoiled), looking so carefree (except when they want a snack, take a walk, and chase a squirrel…all usually when I am on a Zoom meeting), I thought, dogs would be great listeners when preparing to talk to humans about sex.

Here are my 5 reasons why. Sit! Stay!

1. 1. Dogs are better than a mirror. Wouldn’t you rather practice talking about love and relationships looking into those puppy-dog-eyes than a toothpaste-splattered mirror in your bathroom? I mean, c’mon, those long eyelashes and expressive eyebrows evolved over centuries for this very task!

Wouldn’t you rather practice talking about love and relationships looking into those puppy-dog-eyes than a toothpaste-splattered mirror in your bathroom?

1. Dogs are very patient. In fact, they are perfectly content for you to take as long as you need formulating the best way to explain sex, gender, and orientation…just don’t stop rubbing their belly.
2. Dogs are forgiving. While you replay the scene and beat yourself up for messing up what you wanted to say to the other human, dogs will never judge you for choosing the wrong words.
3. Dogs don’t (insert verb from the word bank below) when they hear you say penis or vagina. As long as you are snuggling with them, sharing your blanket, dropping a tortilla chip on the ground, or throwing a tennis ball, you can say penis, vagina, and a whole lot more!

Word bank: blush, freeze, giggle, look horrified, snicker, roll their eyes, bury their face in their paws

5. Dogs can calm us. Not every human is comfortable talking about sex, especially to another human. Their throats tighten, their brain doesn’t cooperate…it can be a disaster! Running fingers through your dogs’ fur right before or during these conversations may be soothing, thus making the conversation not so awful.

If  you are a dog parent, or ever had a loving pet in your life, you already know how responsive they are to our emotions. The point of all this though is just that practicing a tough conversation—like talking about sex—can help you feel more prepared.

Looking for more tips on preparing for these must-have convos about sex? Check out these resources:

Especially…

• • Lesson 4 – It’s Not Just What You Say: Techniques & Approaches for a Healthy Sex Ed Class
  • Lesson 6: Responding with Confidence: Answering Sensitive Questions & Maintaining Boundaries

Check It Out

5 Ways to Become an Approachable Parent: Positive Parenting for Teen Sexual Health

Learn More

Cultural Norms When It Comes to “The Talk”

Learn More

Youth-Friendly Services Assessment Tool & Guide

Learn More

PHOTO CREDIT: Deborah Chilcoat

Deborah Chilcoat, MEd, is a Senior Manager for our Capacity Building and Evaluation Department at Healthy Teen Network and is nationally recognized as a seasoned trainer and adolescent sexual and reproductive health expert. When home, she is savoring every moment with her incredibly fun family and their lovable dogs. Read more about Deb.

Discover the magic of the Network. Let’s chatStay inspired

The post Talking to Your Dog about Sex: 5 Reasons to Prepare for Human Conversations with a More-Forgiving Furry Friend appeared first on Healthy Teen Network.

We’ve heard from the CDC, Dr. Fauci, and just last night, I saw Spike Lee’s COVID vaccination campaign on television. But since the pandemic began, the experiences of young people who are pregnant and parenting have not made national headlines. I’m going to change that with this blog post.

In the fall of 2020, I reached out to colleagues across the country to understand how they were managing to connect with youth who are pregnant and parenting during the pandemic. Really, I asked them to write this blog post for me. Alas, they were so busy meeting the needs of young people that I wound up interviewing them instead.

I came away from these conversations with hope and pride for both the young people and their growing families and the adults who care for them. As you will read, each conversation is unique. Still, there are common themes that emerged: partnership, personal and professional growth, mental health challenges, virtual life, and operational changes. Most of all, though, was a genuine concern for the health and well-being of young people who, even in the best of times, are just trying to succeed.

Thank you to these fabulous adults for their time and care for young people! 

Here are excerpts from our conversations, edited for clarity. 

Laura Pedersen, RN, MSN, Arizona Youth Partnership (AZYP) 

Going virtual during the pandemic increased AZYP’s reach because there were no geographic lines drawn limiting which areas of Arizona they could serve. And, Laura told me that referrals for services were also coming in beyond their usual service area.

Mental health was on her mind, too. “[These] kids are already so isolated,” Laura said, because the young parents’ parents and their community have rejected them. As of fall 2020, they could not be around their peers who are also pregnant, and “peer support is so huge” to the development of the teen and their child. Laura noticed an increase in depression among the AZYP young mothers and was planning to compare the rates to the 2019 rates. “Navigating school demands” and “depending more on family who may not be as supportive” are big challenges.

[I] didn’t have the luxury of time to figure it out. [I] had to do it quickly. [I had] the right people on the team to execute the idea.

As for program operations, the move to virtual service provision has had some benefits. “We are able to combine girls from across the state for classes,” Laura said, “so the burden of teaching too many community-based classes with small numbers isn’t happening.” Recently, Laura shared that AZYP will continue providing supports as a hybrid approach—in-person and online—so that AZYP can “continue reaching those [pregnant and parenting young people] that can’t come to a community location.”

Also, in response to the pandemic, AZYP developed asynchronous videos and posted them on a private YouTube channel for the young people who opted not to attend the live synchronous sessions. Laura is leveraging these videos for training new staff: win-win!

Laura credits her team for the success of AZYP’s work during COVID. “[I] didn’t have the luxury of time to figure it out. [I] had to do it quickly. [I had] the right people on the team to execute the idea.”

Brooke Olson and Jill White, Together For Youth, Young Parents Together

Before COVID, young people came together weekly at the local food bank to have a small meal, socialize, and receive education in breakout groups—a prenatal group and a parenting group—facilitated by Young Parents Together (YPT). When the pandemic started, the food bank set up a drive-through in their parking lot, so folks could pick up boxes of food. YPT leveraged that existing partnership to distribute educational resources, and YPT participants earned incentives for coming.

YPT was able to increase their contact with existing participants, and recruit new participants, during COVID while distributing materials at the drive-through, and referrals to other services also increased. By the fall, the number of youth tripled during the pandemic!

The team got “COVID creative,” as they put it, when the pandemic started by learning how to use Zoom and Google Classroom—skills that are relevant and transferrable across all types of learning and work.

For the young parents, connecting outside of the group settings was challenging and loneliness was real, but as the staff saw the young people talking back-and-forth from their cars at the food bank’s drive-through, they knew it was a positive sign.

“Baby Bucks” and gas cards were great incentives for attending weekly virtual sessions and utilizing the food bank drive-through. The team said, “Zoom uptake was slow, but now, [it’s] great!” YPT participants are more committed to attending, and the group is stronger. Brooke and Jill said it helped to be “more flexible in how we meet.” They went on to say that the “youth call it a family.”

Strengthening relationships extended beyond the young people, too. The team said that they got to know participants’ parents a lot more during the pandemic, and staff wellness was a priority. Routine check-ins were essential to share, learn, and support one another. “We are facing it together.”

A note about professional growth: The team got “COVID creative,” as they put it, when the pandemic started by learning how to use Zoom and Google Classroom—skills that are relevant and transferrable across all types of learning and work.

Emily Brzezicki, United Way Family Center in Brooklyn

At 3:30 on March 12th, Emily knew “we weren’t coming back.” She went on to say, “I got scared.” Emily wanted desperately to provide stability to the young parets in her program. So, she and the team started packing up food, diapers, wipes, and educational materials. The next day, the young parents in the program received the care packages. Over time, the deliveries grew and grew. Even the young parents referred family, neighbors, and friends to the program. Emily couldn’t do it alone, so more staff were making deliveries.

Emily told me that she received text messages from students worried about not going back to school, especially seniors who “were working hard” and were “scared they weren’t going to finish high school.” The seniors also experienced loss and disappointment every time activities were canceled, like the prom and graduation, and for those intending to go, college visits. This dragged on and, as Emily shared, was a “consistent let down over weeks and weeks.” The young parents had faith in the program, Emily said, and that the adults would do everything they could to help them succeed.

Emily said that she is “so impressed by our staff for trying something new, reinforcing the values of the program model, and maintaining connections with families.”

COVID is “affecting the trajectory of two generations.”

Recently, Emily noted, “We actually did not see an increase in depressive symptoms but a decrease in symptoms with the consistent support of staff.” Even with consistent outreach, Emily said some young people didn’t respond because it’s “easier to avoid answering calls than [to] say they need help.”

For some young parents, Emily noted, being parented while parenting is hard, and school is a sanctuary for them. Even as hard as it is juggling parenthood and school—in-person or virtual—these young people want to succeed.

Six months into the pandemic, the young people miss their “old normal.” The program was virtual as of the fall of 2020 but looked very similar to in-person services: groups meet at lunchtime, and individuals have sessions with support staff. Emily assured me that they “have a pulse on everyone.”

Successful strategies deployed included persistent and frequent text messages.
Emily said that she is “so impressed by our staff for trying something new, reinforcing the values of the program model, and maintaining connections with families.”

LeAna Brown, MSW, Health Care Access Maryland (HCAM)

LeAna shared that COVID changed the way that cases at HCAM were triaged. Before the pandemic, there was “lag time because there was only one Community Care Coordinator. As of fall 2020, three coordinators are serving clients, and HCAM planned to stick with this model.

LeAna said that she spent a good amount of time debunking the assumption that some of the “pregnant teens thought that services were not available” due to COVID.

Remember that [young people who are pregnant and parenting] are going through a lot” and [you should] assume that you are “unaware of all [of] the trauma they experienced.

For younger parents, the challenge was trying to parent while in school. LeAna said that the lack of childcare was hard, but some young parents’ parents or grandparents would “watch the child, so they can complete classes or homework.” For older young parents, their challenge was being furloughed or stopping work. Some even had high-risk pregnancies to manage.

While there was an increase in anxiety and depression referrals, LeAna credits her “low-pressure” style and casual and conversational approach with clients for her success. She said she was surprised that clients were willing to talk and open up.

In follow-up conversations with the program director, LeAna said, clients expressed appreciation for LeAna. LeAna’s advice is to “remember that [young people who are pregnant and parenting] are going through a lot” and [you should] assume that you are “unaware of all [of] the trauma they experienced.”

Angelise Shelby, MSW, B’more for Healthy Babies/Promise Heights

Keeping in touch with young parents during COVID has been difficult. Angelise said B’more for Healthy Babies/Promise Heights’ “outreach is mainly social media” and “rely[ing] on partners’ social media.” In fact, some of the hardest things Angelise experienced during the pandemic were not being able to “find and engage” new and young parents and “building relationships [because it’s] hard [to do] over video.” She said they “cannot even do a chat over lunch.”

Engagement has dropped, too. Even though her program is trying to do groups online, as she puts it, clients are “zoomed out.”

Angelise noted an increase in material needs such as diapers, wipes, formula, baby food due to job loss and no daycare during the pandemic.

COVID has been challenging for the young parents she serves because they not only have to take care of themselves and their child; some are also responsible for caring for and supporting the virtual learning of their younger siblings in the home. Angelise said that the young people are “overwhelmed and frustrated.”

Angelise cannot emphasize enough that “parenting youth need respite care,”

Angelise has found that among her participants, marijuana use is up and mental health, specifically anxiety, is quite apparent. For one young parent at the beginning of the pandemic, the only way to see their child was via video call. Thankfully, as of the fall, when Angelise and I talked, they were able to do socially distant, in-person visits.

For some young parents, Angelise said, living with their parents is highly stressful. At the beginning of the pandemic, she “got a lot of calls [from young parents] saying they need to get out” of the house and “go somewhere for a few days to calm down.” Angelise cannot emphasize enough that “parenting youth need respite care,” even if it is only it is to “drop off their child for a day or two.” She added, “Parents need somewhere to go, too” because “emergency shelter is the only option now.”

Angelise shared a piece of personal growth that she noted over the course of the pandemic—and arguably professional growth—that had a ripple effect. She learned to set boundaries with her clients, which, in turn, “clients had to learn patience” and “figure it out until [she] could help them.” The young parents had to “be planful” and she said, “they’ve gotten better.”

One of the greatest surprises Angelise shared was that the “clients ask how staff are doing,” and it showed her that “we reached them on a deeper level than she thought.”

Wrapping It All Up

These amazing people and their teams deserve so much more than a blog post from Healthy Teen Network. If you agree, share this with your colleagues coast-to-coast.

As for the rest of us, it’s not too late to start doing things now to support young people who are pregnant and parenting during the pandemic. How can you leverage partnerships? What changes can your programs make? What personal and professional growth could support this work?

P.S. If you’re looking for a resource to help you think about planning your programs and services, check out the Young Parents Logic Model.

Hang in there, everyone!

Deborah Chilcoat, MEd, is a Senior Manager for our Capacity Building and Evaluation Department at Healthy Teen Network and is nationally recognized as a seasoned trainer and adolescent sexual and reproductive health expert. When home, she is savoring every moment with her incredibly fun family and their lovable dogs. Read more about Deb.

The post Zooming, No Contact Deliveries, and Food Bank Drive-Throughs: Engaging Young Parents (and Parents-to-Be!) During A Pandemic appeared first on Healthy Teen Network.

D iscrimination against pregnant and parenting students is alive and well…and could be getting worse! In February, attorney generals from 19 states and the District of Columbia sent Secretary of Education, Betsy DeVos, a letter expressing their “strong opposition” to proposed changes to Title IX. It’s a juicy one, too!  They make the case that the changes would decrease protections against students who are pregnant and parenting—as well as LGBTQ+ and gender-expansive students. They even include statements like “The consequences of the Department’s proposed rule for the States’ students and residents are potentially dire and long-lasting,” and use lawyer-lingo like “arbitrary and capricious” and “evidentiary support.”

We created an infographic that explains Title IX and Maryland’s law regarding excused absences for pregnant and parenting students in simple language for students and staff.

The problem, as I see it, is that the rights of students who are pregnant or parenting are being chipped away, few people notice, and the news doesn’t cover it. Honestly, unless I had been writing this post and doing a Google search for examples of Title IX violations, I may still be “in the dark” about it, too. Yikes, right?

Guess what? I was angry and frustrated before I started writing this post because even without the proposed changes to Title IX, young parents’ rights are still being violated. I really would have thought that the 2017 report by the National Women’s Law Center (NWLC), Let Her Learn: Stopping School Pushout for Girls Who Are Pregnant or Parenting, would have been a wake-up call for anyone who is bound by Title IX. I guess some people just didn’t get the message.

An Infographic for Young People Who Are Pregnant or Parenting

Healthy Teen Network is a partner on Map 2 Success, a project of the Baltimore City Health Department and Maryland Department of Health, funded by the Department of Health and Human Services Pregnancy Assistance Fund. We created an infographic that explains Title IX and Maryland’s law regarding excused absences for pregnant and parenting students in simple language for students and staff.

Deborah Chilcoat, MEd, is a Senior Manager for our Capacity Building and Evaluation Department at Healthy Teen Network and is nationally recognized as a seasoned trainer and adolescent sexual and reproductive health expert. When home, she is savoring every moment with her incredibly fun family and their lovable dogs. Read more about Deb.

The post Title IX: Protect Your Rights appeared first on Healthy Teen Network.

I want to start a revolution. Right here. Right now. It cannot wait another moment. And I don’t mean the kind of revolution that requires us to occupy our local parks for weeks on end, or the kind that fizzles out when it’s no longer fashionable, or one that pits women against one another.

I want to start a revolution. I want Mother’s Day to be as Anna Jarvis envisioned: a day of rest for mothers…ALL mothers, including mothers who had their children young. Young mothers deserve to be served breakfast in bed, forgiven their laundry duty for 24 hours, and treated like royalty when they arrives at Friendly’s for a hard-earned hot fudge sundae.

I want young moms to know that they will be supported, not scorned, for seeking help when their own well of patience runs dry.

I want to start a revolution. I want the greeting card mega-industry to include a selection of cards that gushes over the sacrifices young moms make; that celebrates their stamina and applauds their courage. I want the card to capture the reverence I feel when I think about the young women who tenderly kiss their child goodbye as they leave for school or work, spend sleepless nights soothing their child’s cries or bravely scare away the monsters under the bed, real or imagined. I want young moms to know that they will be supported, not scorned, for seeking help when their own well of patience runs dry.

I want to start a revolution. I want politicians to stop bickering. Specifically, I want them to stop bickering about who protects children and women more, Democrats or Republicans (which can be contradictory in the case of teen moms and their babies), which type of sexuality education works best (even though research proves that abstinence-only-until-marriage sex education is a complete failure), and which programs should get axed from government funding (without regard for their merits. Think, Title X Family Planning.). Young mothers are often too busy to worry about the political games played in Washington, D.C. But, we, the professionals who work with young parents must advocate on their behalf…with their involvement.

However, even after 40 years of Title IX, young women are still being discriminated against for being pregnant, giving birth, or parenting and are subsequently dropping out–no, cast out–of school.

I want to start a revolution. I want an education system that stands up for the rights of young mothers and enforces Title IX–The Equal Opportunity in Education Act. When Title IX was enacted in 1972, the birth rate among women 15-19 years old was at a then-historic low (61.7 out of 1,000). In 2012, CDC data show that teen birth rates have dropped to 34.3 per 1,000. However, even after 40 years of Title IX, young women are still being discriminated against for being pregnant, giving birth, or parenting and are subsequently dropping out–no, cast out–of school. Considering that education is directly linked to employment and economic security, young women and their children are often relegated to a life of poverty. Mothers, of any age, have a right to an education free of discrimination and the right to economic opportunity.

I want to start a revolution. I want more research conducted in the field of pregnant and parenting adolescents and young adults; the complexity of the issues surrounding young parenthood can be overwhelming, even for a seasoned practitioner like me. I want…no scratch that…WE ALL need more evidence-based programs that have been rigorously evaluated and proven to delay or prevent subsequent teen pregnancies. I want teen mothers to have the knowledge, skills, and ability to space their children’s birth greater than two years so that they and their family can be more successful in their educational and economic endeavors.

I want young mothers to speak up and claim the honor, respect, and appreciation they deserve…and not just on Mother’s Day. I admire young mothers because they, too, struggle with the daily grind of parenthood: long days, longer nights, and worrying if they are doing right by their children.

I want to start a revolution. I want young mothers to speak up and claim the honor, respect, and appreciation they deserve…and not just on Mother’s Day. I admire young mothers because they, too, struggle with the daily grind of parenthood: long days, longer nights, and worrying if they are doing right by their children. Every mom wonders if she’ll miss a momentous occasion, if she’s being too strict or too lax in her discipline, or if her kids will remember the times she caught their vomit in my, ah-hem, her hand. Young mothers are no different. Considering this, doesn’t it seem disingenuous NOT to celebrate young mothers on Mother’s Day…and everyday?

I feel the verve intensifying… Will you join the revolution?

Just for the record, THIS mother doesn’t expect breakfast in bed (There’s no time, I’ve got to shuttle my daughter to soccer tryouts and have to coach my son’s soccer game…all before noon!) or a reprieve from the laundry (Is it weird to experience nirvana while folding clean towels?). But I have already told my children that my Mother’s Day will be complete with them in my presence and a double-scoop of butter pecan ice cream in my tummy.

Happy Mother’s Day to all the moms reading this…no matter how old you are!

Deborah Chilcoat, MEd, is a Senior Manager for our Capacity Building and Evaluation Department at Healthy Teen Network and is nationally recognized as a seasoned trainer and adolescent sexual and reproductive health expert. When home, she is savoring every moment with her incredibly fun family and their lovable dogs. Read more about Deb.

The post Talking About a Revolution appeared first on Healthy Teen Network.